San Antonio, TX
How do you define this statement in your own life?
“The word translated 'guard' is a military term that means to protect with a sentry. The image is one of a guard marching around the border of our hearts and minds to keep out the pressing anxieties of life. This is only promised if we routinely turn every worry and need over to God and develop an attitude of gratitude. When we turn our worries over to the care of God, we will discover the protection of inner peace that exceeds our understanding.” ~ Daily New Life Devotional by Steve Arterburn
Isn’t that beautiful?
You see, for me, I had it all wrong…
I thought guarding my heart meant locking it up so no one could get near it or hurt me… Every time someone hurts me, my reaction is to withdraw, and a strengthening vow follows every time that says the only person I can depend on is me… I don’t need anyone—my mantra. Pretty lonely place to be, and it never stops or prevents the hurt from coming on… I’ve just learned over the years to keep people at arm’s length, never letting anyone get too close, hiding my insecurities, vulnerabilities, feelings; in turn, it’s made me shameful and fearful in many ways.
It’s only now, I realize after starting my own spiritual journey seeking God, that as women our hearts are designed after God’s own heart, with a longing for adventure, beauty and romance… This comes from the book Captivating by John and Staci Eldridge, and one of the best books I’ve ever read!
We are all broken, wounded souls in need of healing and restoration to God’s design for us.
“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it careful round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable… The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers… of love is Hell.” ~ C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
I don’t want that fate for myself… do you?
The only way to heal and restore our hearts is to seek God with our whole heart and invite him into our brokenness because nothing else can fill that deep void. That is a scary thing for me, to give up control of my own life and let God into my heart… to feel all of the hurt and feelings I’ve suppressed for so long…While I believe in God, and have invited Him into my heart, I still fear letting go, which is where I seem to be stuck in my spiritual journey!
Dear God, “Please help me figure out a way to crumble the wall I’ve built around my heart…”
My spiritual journey seeking God has not been easy thus far, but is extremely enriching and rewarding… an adventure for sure! Full of both trials and revelations, I constantly seek His word, pray and give thanks—I am learning to renew my mind constantly to be more like Christ and have seen little transformations here and there. I just try to keep in mind that this is also a life-long journey that will be filled with disappointments, mistakes, forgiveness and repentiveness for my sin nature, but also the peace and joy that comes from putting my trust in God to be in control of my life!
If you are reading this article today, and something you’ve read resonates within your own heart, please turn to God and invite him into your own life to heal and restore your broken heart!
“He heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds.” ~ Psalm 147:3 (NIV)